Whenever I wish to remember a time when I was truly happy, I need only recall each day with you. It's been 3 years since your passing. I know you, Mahala, Mark & Cleofe are in great hands with the Lord. Still, I can't help but miss you. It still hurts knowing that you're never coming back but I do take comfort that you are saving a spot up there for me. I must say y'all have the great acts and entertainers up there. It's slim pickins as far as entertainment on earth is concerned. LOL!!! Not a day goes by that you're not missed. I feel good knowing that you are amongst my guardian angels and that God has assigned you to be with me every step of the way.
You'd be so proud of me and Jonathan right now. Tee hee. In the last 3 years, I've seen and found love many times and I remain hopeful. Also, I know now that your death was definitely not in vain. Unfortunate as it may sound, your passing is my blessing in disguise. I've gotten that much stronger with the fact that if I can live through the tragedy of losing you then, learning to breathe on my own again, I know I can get through anything--and for that, I thank you wholeheartedly. As for Jonathan, he's an E-4 Submariner now, he's takin' a liking to his post and Hawaii. Although, I have to confess--I have yet to visit Hawaii. LOL!!! He's also found and lost love, but hey--you win some and you lose some, right?! He'll live, he is after all my son. He's underway right now and I miss talking to him during the week. I have dropped an email to him to let him know the same.
Wow, I've done so much in the last 3 years that I thought I never would have done before you left. Even though my book(s) are a work in progress, they're on their way UP. I've also found peace. Right now, I'm working on my relationship with myself and setting the boundaries for me and others. I want to feel complete again, but I'm leaving that to time--who knows, perhaps that void that was once filled by you will be filled again or maybe, I've had my happiness with you--for that, I'm thankful too. I don't know, I'll surrender that notion and leave it up to God.
Well, I've gotta run. Tell my loved ones "hello" for me. Every single one of you remain in my prayers. I will always love you, Sweetums.
~Maria