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7 Months

3/20/2014

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This month I celebrate my 7th month of being smoke-free. I was a cigarette smoker of 22 years and never in those 22 years did I actually take a step towards quitting. I am so proud of myself (**patting myself on the back**)! Since then, I have also been going to the gym to fill in that "smoking" void. I can attest that It is true that when the human spirit affirms and takes action, ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE. If anyone would have told me that I would quit smoking in 2013, I would have laughed HARD in their face. 

I have researched my options, my doctor had a talk with me about quitting, I've also talked with others who quit smoking and finally I made up my own mind as to what course I was going to take to quit smoking. I am sure there were other alternatives besides the main ones that appealed to me which were: 

1.  E-Cigarettes or Electronic Cigarettes (aka Vaping) where you would fill these electronic cigarettes with a certain amount of nicotine or other flavored liquids then afterwards, puff on the electronic cigarette, well, like a cigarette.

2.  The Nicotine Patch whereby you would place the patch on your arm and depending on how long you leave the patch on, the patch releases a steady flow of nicotine for about 16-24 hours.  

3.  Varenicline (aka Chantix) where you take a pill as prescribed by the doctor.

In the end, I chose to quit cold turkey! It was a hard thing to do, no doubt, I cried for the first month after quitting and went through what appeared to be withdrawals:  I was depressed, I fed my oral fixation with eating--I ate till I felt like I was going to burst and I was jumping out of my skin out of anxiety. Still, through it all, I continued to go to the gym to build up my strength, stamina and endurance; AND I meditated daily. 7 months later, I'm still here--stronger and better. From my experience, ALL OF IT was worth it, I felt/feel better about myself and my accomplishments. I also had a great support system whom continue to love and support me and I appreciate them always.

Well, that's my take and I hope what I shared with you helps in your own journey and goals. Till next time, I bid you all love, light and compassion.


~Maria 
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Dear Anthony - A Letter of Closure

3/10/2014

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Dear Anthony,

I felt your presence in your childhood home this weekend as I was surrounded by your loved ones. You were very blessed and we were all blessed to have had you in our lives. I am still reeling from shock with the news of your passing, for me honestly, you were too young to die. But, who am I to question Our Creator? God needed you home because your mission here on earth was complete. You definitely touched our lives in all ways possible.

I'll go straight to the point, although we have not spoken in years, you know you were a big part of my life--a kick-started turning point which eventually lead me to where I am today. For that, I am grateful to you. We had some good and not so good times, but I learned a lot about myself in our relationship as lovely and crazy as it was. We were different people at that point in our lives, we were young, crazy and in love with life and all it had to offer us. We didn't agree on a lot of things but the one thing we agreed on was we were both crazy about our children. I know just how proud you are/were of Valarie because I felt proud seeing her. She's grown up to be the beautiful, intelligent AND confident young woman she is today thanks to you, Angie, Tom and the love of family. You have nothing to worry about Valarie, after the grieving period, I know she'll be fine. Now, you can be with your baby girl ALWAYS. 

Also, I want you to know this, the past is the past and neither of us can do anything to change it, you can go to the afterlife knowing all has been forgiven. What I truly hoped and prayed for is that you forgave yourself. Go to the other side in peace, give all of our loved ones a big Angelic hug and kiss from US here on earth and put in a good word for us with "The One." Thank you for the memories, Anthony and most of all, thank you for the closure to this chapter in my life.

Always,
Maria
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March Madness

3/3/2014

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Message from Spirit for March:  "Welcome the new moon energy into your life with open arms, what ever you may be guided to release, know that your efforts have already been awarded. What we need from You, Dear Ones, is to let go and have faith in God. Remember when you do finally release, the change in you will be great and you will never be the same. You are supported and We will guide You, You need only ask and Your Spirit Guidance team will be there at Your disposal."    

WOW--March madness…And I’m not talkin’ about basketball either!  LOL!!!  I’m starting this month on a RUN, instead of walking—I look forward to what March has in store for me. For February, I learned self-love and how to keep my own fire burning; that journey continues. Each month brings with it a theme to take with me during my journey.  I see all of my dreams continue to unfold right before my eyes. For March, Spirit is leading me down the road of perseverance. How bad do I want my dream to come true? What would I do to thrust myself forward? Would I finally step OUT of my own comfort zone to make room for bigger things?  What fear is left inside of me that I need to face head on and clear out? The answers to the latter are all within me and will be unleashed in time. I believe in DIVINE TIMING - everything happening when they are supposed to happen. 

I’m glad YOU are on this journey with me; that only means WE ARE ON A SIMILAR JOURNEY—one of discovery, of love and of courage. At this time, I cannot go into too much details of this month. I will say this; I AM taking the biggest steps necessary to propel my life’s purpose and self-improvement forward. For that, I do my part in making this world a better place now and for the future.  The biggest blessing of all of this is my Prince’s arrival; my son comes home this month!!!!! Woo Hoo!!!! Life keeps getting better.  Also, I can’t say this enough—I love You all for your continued love, support and prayers; know that even though I might not (yet) personally know you, WE ARE CONNECTED THRU THE ONE and with that—know that you all are in my prayers and meditation.

Till next time I bid you all love, light and compassion, My Loves.

~Maria
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    Maria San Juan

    This page is all about uplifting messages and the twists and turns of my journey...This is my safe haven full of love and free from judgment.  :o)

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