Notice the full moon and the haze around it - even with our last full moon; some of us didn't take advantage of the release and renewal of energy therefore, some of us have either ran ourselves or are running ourselves into the ground. Also, notice the beautiful dragon looking at its own tail as if she were "chasing her tail" while struggling to hold onto to her overflowing pot of gold. Please accept the help that is offered for your own inner peace and most of all, life balance.

Messages from the Angels:

"You are overexerting yourself and you do not even know it - your body is reacting to it because with your body overworked, your immune system is down and you are contracting illnesses (like the common cold, the flu, stomach flu or perhaps unexplained aches or pain). Please accept the help from others it is part of your own self care. You are working more and playing less therefore your life is out of balance.

When is the last time you had quiet time or treated yourself to fresh air? If you cannot remember, then self-care is long overdue. If you can't afford a spa day, a nice walk [weather permitting, of course] around the park or your neighborhood will help you clear your mind and even de-clutter it. Perhaps even sitting quietly with your eyes closed and taking slow, deep breaths with the intention of release and renewal should do the trick. Your body needs renewed and refreshed air and energy - this can only happen when you take 10-15 minutes out of your day, every day. You have been so busy caring for others that you have placed yourself on the back-burner. Please take care of yourself and ask us, your angels, for ways to help you in this area if you are unsure. Then, listen AND see the repetitive messages we give you and take it as the self-care regimen that you need to balance out your life. Please start today with no delay. Everyone has 10 minutes to break from their work day and that is all that is needed for now just to get your life back on balance.

***For you healers, please perform your aura cleansing or reiki on yourselves at least once a week,preferably on a Sunday.***"

Brothers and sisters - I bid you all love, light and compassion - be kind to yourself and others.

~Maria

Message from Archangel Jeremiel:  "Whether you feel ready or not, you have known for quite some time now that you are being pushed in a direction for your own highest good. Where you are currently no longer serves your highest good and you already know that it is time to leave this unhealthy situation. Call on me to help you release any and all stuck, worrisome and stubborn energies so that you may proceed fearlessly. Abundance awaits you once you accept that shift in your life. Remember that everything happens for a reason - don't worry, you are doing the right thing by stepping out and away from your comfort zone - this is the way to your happiness and to your peace of mind."

Good morning, Lovers! I had another awesome weekend with my loves and I hope you all had a wonderful weekend too! Let's remember, that we shouldn't have to wait for Valentine's day to show the love we have for each other and that we should love and live each day like it is Valentine's day - full of love and life.

With that in mind, I know there are quite a few of you who have been following me since my beginnings and there are those who just started following me - I've gone through different phases in my life and now I'm going through another phase in my life. I believe this is all a part of life and a part of my grieving process for losing my mom.

Lately, I have been questioning myself, my gifts and wondering and asking God if He has taken back my gifts - I was answered with "No my child, this is your time to grieve the loss of your mom, remember that each phase you go through, you grow in power and even though you don't feel your powers, you are still powerful." I didn't understand it.

Then, within the last 3 weeks - I saw a spirit, an unfamiliar woman - who I thought to be an evil spirit. I prayed, meditated and did all I could to banish this spirit - when my mom appeared and I heard my own inner voice saying, "talk to her [the spirit]." As I approached the spirit - who bore a resemblance to the main character of "The Ring", I couldn't stand the stench exuding from her and her skin was all cut up to the point of decaying and I couldn't see her face. I figured - I've faced worst, I might as well ask her what she wants with me.

I asked her, "who are you? And what do you want from me?" Her reply both shocked me and saddened me:

"I am you, I am everything you hate about yourself - you manifested me and now I'm here. We need to be re-joined. Why can't you love me with the same unconditional love you give to others?"

We both sobbed as my mother pushed "me", the ugly side of me, into my arms. I then replied to her:

"I am so sorry, I didn't know I treated you so badly. I promise you that I will love you unconditionally. I know it will take time to get there but I will love you - all of me completely."

She replied with "we need to be rejoined, so we can be one again." She's been with me ever since. I can't say when we'll be "one again" but she continues to remind me that I need to love me unconditionally.

I am sharing this with all of you because the journey to rediscovering one self and the journey to spirituality is not just one stop but a constant evolution. There is no ending and no beginning - my journey, like yours, just is.

Till next time, I bid you all love, light and compassion.

~Maria

This week's video blog or Vlog is dedicated to the following:  my OFWs - Overseas Filipino Workers; all of my brothers and sisters worldwide who are working in other places besides the U.S. to support their families in their native countries and basically to everyone who dares to dream, come to a new land and know they will always have the support of God and their family.

I found this video today which I shot back in 2013 and this is a glimpse of the love I have to leave behind and why a little piece of my heart is left behind on each visit to the PI. Here you will see my dad, the comedian and my fire-driven mom who just passed away on December 30, 2015. I love capturing their banters on film and I know dad hasn't seen this or forgot about this - so if you guys are anywhere near my pop, please share this vlog with him.

I will miss seeing the silhouette of my mom at the screen door as she patiently waits for me to come home from the airport upon my first arrival in PI. I will miss also each time she bids me goodbye and tells me no crying to which I uncontrollably sob as I hug her tight and how she reminds me that one year flies by. I will miss seeing her silhouette at the screen door as she waves goodbye to me and I know that once she can no longer see our car, she silently closes the door to weep.

I truly believed that mom and many of our loved ones silently weep when we leave to return to our respective workplaces/temporary homes. I also believe that I am not the only one who bears the guilt of leaving each time, but that the guilt is exonerated only through the fact we chose and sacrificed to be where we are for the sake of not only better opportunities for ourselves but also for the greater good of our families. We, when I say we - I am speaking for my people who leave behind loved ones in other countries in order to work and take care of the family, we do our best and our best shows each time when we come home. Our best shows when we see the smiles of our loved ones faces, in the blessings and abundance of food and shelter. That our elders are well-cared for and have their medical needs fulfilled.

Seeing this video was bittersweet for me. I hope you enjoy this vlog. Till next time I bid you all love, light and compassion.

~Maria

This blog is dedicated to my mother, such a beautiful and strong soul. We lost my mommy on December 30, 2015; her body finally succumbed to diabetic complications. Life indeed is too short, I only knew her 43 years of my life and even then, that time still wasn't long enough. I can at least say that I gave my best to her till her last day on earth in December 2015 - for that I am very thankful.

I find that I am able to express myself better through personal letters, so here we go.

Dear Mommy,

Hello and I'm happy to see you are no longer suffering but I'm so so sad that I no longer get to hold you tight and shower you with my wet kisses (which you found unappealing, yet funny). Even till your last breath, you gave us all a good fight and went down gloriously into heaven. I must be candid with you. When I saw you in the hospital on December 24, 2015 upon arrival in the Philippines, I saw you and your life flash right before my eyes; as if a hint of your exit from this world. Even then, when you were "straddling" heaven and earth - I still wasn't prepared to let you go. I honestly think that we kept your spirit here even though your body retired upon admission to the hospital back on December 19th. You knew you weren't going to make it and forgive me, mommy, but I thought you would still pull through like all the other times. I denied it all, thinking we still had time together. You would think that I learned my lessons about how precious time is, instead of taking it for granted.

I want to ask you, personally, was I enough for you? Did you feel that I loved you enough, that I loved you unconditionally? You know me the perpetual perfectionist (that which I am working on...), I want to know. I guess I'll know once the grieving "dies down" no pun intended. When the time is right, you will visit me in my dreams because that's our new meeting place and you will tell me if I was enough for you, if you felt enough love from me. I knew you loved me for me, all of me unconditionally, but I didn't realize how much more a mother can love her child until I felt your loss. Losing you left another huge void which we both know will never ever be filled EXCEPT UNTIL we meet again of course.

Are you adjusting? I bet you are, you were a strong, smart and beautiful spirit and I know you are showing others (who have been there longer than you have) the ropes and adjustments of the afterlife. You always said I was the fighter and the survivor - I now know that I got all of that from you. Remember, you were the one,  that despite your steady income and comfortable lifestyle in the Philippines, you knew you were bound for something greater and you got out of your comfort zone and came to the United States. You made a solemn vow to God that if He granted you abundance (which he did) you vowed to return to your homeland and give back to your family, to your community. Well, your wishes were fulfilled, you came to America, met daddy here, had me and even purchased your homes in the United States and in the Philippines - both of which were products of your sacrifices, blood, sweat and tears and you never asked for a hand-out nor were you on welfare. You and daddy worked your asses off to give me the best; always putting others before yourself. You and daddy are awesome like that - you guys have a beautiful heart and soul. It was also beautiful to see the first two "kids" you put through school, Rex and Ailyn, both take care of you. They're like my 2 siblings - they love you as I do and I know you are just as proud of them as I am.

I know you have seen all of our family and ancestors, but have you seen Chris? Have you talked to him? Have you seen Sami and talked to her? How about Gina? or Anthony? I can't wait to talk to you again when the time is right where you will visit me in my dreams - and I look forward to that.

I love you and I miss you so much. Don't worry, I am stepping up to my role and I promise to take the best care of daddy and Jonathan. I will preserve your memory in our home as much as I can (dad's already renovating - ayayay!) There's so much I want to say to you but for now, know that I cherish the memories I have of you and I that I will forever be grateful and honored to be your daughter. I love you forever.

Love Always,
Maritess

So there you have it, I've shared a piece of my heart and soul to you in this intimate letter to my mommy. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing this.

Till next time, I bid you all love, light and compassion.

~Maria